Angry birds are just offsprings from Sesame Street characters :)

(via pinklovelife)

Is pride really worth not going for what I really want?

Last summer I realized that home just wasn’t home for me anymore. I felt that I didn’t belong there anymore and that no matter how hard I tried, I just won’t fit in. I feel too many eyes on me, judging me, just waiting for me to make a slip. True I’ve always felt the same way when I was growing up there, but somehow this time I actually feel the coldness of it all.

I dread going home. I dread the guilty feeling I’ll have once I’m there. I dread everything that would happen there that’ll make me feel like I’m abandoning them. Most of all I hate myself for letting them make me feel that way about myself.

So here I am in one of the most interesting places I’ve been so far. The people are small, the food awesome and the traffic…let’s just say that everyone believes that they have the right of way every time.

It’s been a week since I’ve been home, and seems much longer than that. Actually, what it really feels like is both slow and fast. Most importantly, it’s exactly what I thought it was going to be. I’m already feeling like I’m pulled into this whirlpool which I’ve been trying to run away from. 

Still not everything is that bad. There has been some fun attached and hopefully more fun to look forward to. 

ENG250 group project. Still lots of work to be done…but getting there!

11 days to leaving for home. Well 13 if you take travel time into consideration. 

I’m having mixed feelings about this trip. A part of me doesn’t want to, but I know I’m needed there. Only thing is that I don’t know how much it would be appreciated. I’m dreading this. 

Home would mean a lot of sorting out to do this time. It’s not going to be much of a holiday, but duty calls. Duty. Responsibility. Another sore topic for the moment. It’s so hard to come up with a decision. It doesn’t seem fair, but life isn’t fair. Hopefully when the time comes it’s going to be an easy one. 

Afterthought:

I guess now I’m partly looking forward to home. Some pampering and a week in Vietnam should do my heart good. It might be just what I need to face this final semester.